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Plainville, CT, United States
Having achieved my goal of becoming a published author, I contribute it to the fact that I have been writing since the age of 9. My boys were the inspiration for my children's stories and my life is the inspiration for my autobiography. I have a tendency to write about whatever I feel, relevant, interesting or not. I welcome any comments you may have, positive or constructive. Thank you so much for visiting and following my blog, My life.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

5.24.16

I couldn't wait for today to get here.  How long has it been?  26 years?  Feels like a lifetime.  I was finally going to get to see you again, that's all that mattered now.  I must have changed my shirt half a dozen times this mornng, finding just the right thing to wear.  Not too revealing, but worthy to wear to work.
Shoot. I was acting and feeling like a school girl again.  I was so excited I had a hard time making it through my day, but I finally did.

I admit, it was hard to concentrate, but I managed to muddle through.  The minutes seemed like hours to me, time appeared to be advancing so slowly, the anticipation was excruciating.

When afternoon finally came I at least saw a light at the end of the tunnel.  I tried not to look at the clock because if I did I knew that time would appear to be standing still again and I certainly didn't want that to happen.

Finally it was time to leave.  I made one last trip to the ladies room to make sure I looked ok and then took off.  I kept checking my phone for a message from you telling me what type of car you were driving so I could watch for you but I never got one.  I shrugged it off as just you waiting until the last possible moment to get up so that you would lose as little sleep as possible.  You would send a message, I was sure of it.

There it was, Denny's.  That's where I was finally going to be able to see you again!  I pulled in, carefully looking at each vehicle in the parking lot to see if you were sitting in one of them.  Not yet!  I made it first.  I went to the back of the parking lot, but still in a spot where you would see me when you pulled in, and I waited quite anxiously for your arrival.

I decided to pull out my phone and play a game to make the time pass quicker.  I checked the clock.....It was already 4pm.  I had been sitting there for 20 minutes waiting for you.  Maybe you got up late?  I decided to send you a text just to let you know where I was parked.  I didn't get a reply and I started to get sad.  I had to be careful, I had to go in to a meeting in 25 minutes so I couldn't cry or I would ruin my makeup.  15 minutes.  I would wait 15 more minutes and then I would have not choice - I would have to go into my meeting.  I decided to play a little more on my phone to pass the time.
The next time I looked up at the clock it was 4:25.  Time to go.  I couldn't wait any longer so I sent you a text that I was sorry to have missed you, and then went to my meeting.

I guess I probably shouldn't have gotten so excited and expected you to be there.  I knew you worked 3rd shift and I knew that you were sleeping and would have to wake up in order to come see me. I have no one to blame but myself for getting my hopes up.

I try so hard to understand, but my heart just wants to be sad right now so I think I'll let it.

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